Getting off the plane the complete opposite of fresh faced and quietly shitting myself that after 14 hours I was going to have to drive 55 minutes on the opposite side of the road to my Airbnb, I’d arrived in L.A. and I was excited.
Fast forward 72 hours and that excitement turned into WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS PLACE!?
So, what happened from the time I got off the plane ready to hell yes all over L.A. to hell fucking no?
There’s a lot of misguided energy in L.A.
Mostly because no matter how much we’re used to seeing it in the business world, L.A. can’t pull off a 12 Step Fail Proof Plan That Someone Can Take To ‘Making It’
Because of that, there’s a lot of despondent people in L.A. too.
And I just so happened to meet up with a few people who were down in the dumps in my first 72 hours.
Thanks to the affirmations that filled my journal saying I was going to go to L.A. with my heart open, it seemed I opened up my entire energy to a bunch of people who were hating on their work.
And boy did I feel it.
The ‘it’s all too hard’
The ‘this sucks’
The ‘why isn’t it happening for me yet?’
The negativity was palpable that I jumped on the bandwagon.
So. Not. Me.
It wasn’t until I had an in person session with my screenwriting career coach where I burst into tears that I realised I’d let everyone else’s shitty outlook pile on top of my own.
The thing is, if for even one second I believed I was exactly like everyone else out there trying to make it, I may as well have never gone to L.A.
I’d never make it with that kind of ‘tude.
The truth is, I believe I’m better than 99% of the world trying to make it as a screenwriter.
I have to.
It’s called unwavering faith.
I just wasn’t acting like it.
I’d let the years of tears from other people pile onto of me, taking it on as my own.
I wasn’t protecting myself, my energy + my vision.
And that’s exactly what I needed to do.
Protect my energy.
Keep the faith.
Stay on the path.
The moment I realised none of the shit I was feeling was my own, everything changed.
After my session I headed to Cafe Gratitude and sat at the bar next to a random woman who was so fucking positive and open and we had the best chats about Malibu and surfing.
I went to a writer’s workshop and even though I didn’t connect with anyone, I stayed in my power + in my lane.
I had the best sushi lunch date with two of my crew and it felt like hanging out with long lost best friends.
Then I met up with the amazing Melissa Cassera and her positivity blew me away.
Here’s what I realised:
I’m so fucking good at being discerning when it comes to my business.
I see through a lot of the scare tactics, the dramatic rags to riches stories, the general make you feel like shit because you’re not at their level posts.
And I’m so good at letting that shit go and sticking to my path.
But being brand new at screenwriting and feeling like a lost little lamb, I was picking up shit I shouldn’t have been touching with a 10-foot pole.
You might be so fresh and so clean as a business owner, or you might have been in the game since the beginning with me,
But we all need the reminder:
Protect your energy.
Always check in with yourself:
Is this me? Or is this someone else?
And remember, you always know best.
So if you believe, deep in your heart, you got this.
Then guess what?
You. Got. This.